The object I have decided to discuss is my great-grandmother’s medallion of the Virgin Mary. My great-grandmother, Filomena Pugliese has always been a beloved family figure. My mother told me countless stories about her paternal grandmother before I even got to see a photo of her for the first time. Though I don’t think either of the two photos I have of Filomena fully do her justice. The younger photo taken in 1926 shows her at 38 years old with her husband, Pietro Botte, and their seven children, technically eight as at the time she was pregnant with their son Daniel. This photo has become an heirloom in itself, depicting our Albanian-Italian family still partially in its beginnings in Brooklyn, NY. My beloved grandpa can be seen in the center, held by his father, this being one of the earliest photos we have of him. However, through this photo it was hard to know these people, to see past their strong expressions to who they are. That is where my mother’s help came in handy as she was able to let me in on the most endearing parts of Filomena Pugliese. 

The most fitting aspect I was able to learn about Filomena is that she had the utmost admiration for the Virgin Mary, even requesting to be buried in a blue dress just like the Madonna. This allows me to know a different meaning of her medallion. This was not just a random religious keepsake, it was HER Madonna that she would keep with her for the entirety of her adult life. It is debated whether it was given to her as a gift for her wedding in September of 1907 or if it was gifted to her by Pietro sometime in the decade following the wedding. Either way, it is known that this was a gift to her, and that the person who gave her the pendant was aware of her love of Mary. 

One can still see her hand on the pendant, clutched between thumb and pointer finger every time Filomena said her Hail Mary. The Mary’s features have been partially wiped away with these decades of rubbing, leaving a slightly smooth texture across her figure. Along the way three of the twenty-eight marcasite stones have become lost to time, perhaps lost to the grabbing of her children or grandchildren. The mother of pearl inlaid in the pendant still holds its smooth, lively shine, adding an ethereal feeling to the piece. When looking at the back of the pendant there is a hole where it looks like there might have once been a pin, so that the pendant may be worn on the clothes, which my mother recalls Filomena doing sometimes. However, the piece at the top shows that the pendant would actually go on to be worn exclusively as a necklace, though it is unclear when this switch actually happened. The chain it was once worn on has also been lost upon its passing from Filomena to my mother, Marie. 

This pendant and its worn appearance gives a glimpse into Filomena’s life and perhaps why she might have so heavily held on to her Mary. By the time she died in August of 1980 at the age of 92, she had buried her husband and six of her ten children. By the time she was 45, Filomena had already lost three of her children as well as her husband. Her twin daughters died in their first year of the Spanish flu in 1919. Her youngest son, Danny, tragically died in 1933 during a botched tonsillectomy. In 1928, Pietro Botte attempted to break up a street fight and had his own smoking pipe jammed into his left eye, dying of an infection days later as the family could not afford the hospital visit. Being left a widow with seven children during the Great Depression would have been unimaginably difficult for Filomena. She overcame so much hardship, yet the only traits my mother can connect to Filomena are her serenity, kindness, and warmth. Filomena’s devotion to her children was paid back to her later in life. Her daughter Catterina, Aunt Kitty, would forgo marriage to spend her life caring for her mother. My grandfather, Jimmy, had such a love for his mother that he stopped eating when he was 92, claiming he wanted to die at the same age as her. 

I am glad that the pendant now sits in my mother’s hands. As a widow herself raising three kids, I think her grandmother has become one of her sources of strength. Filomena has become such a representation of strength and endurance for my family. If anything, I think it might be fitting that the figure on her pendant has become featureless, as it now feels like a representative of Filomena rather than just being a pendant to the Virgin Mary.